Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Our Heavenly Father Knows Us Better update for Jessica 10-15-14

This week was crazy and packed! Our work often gets disrupted with exchanges because sister training leaders and I've been really struggling with that. I don't know if I seem like it but I'm one of those missionaries who really likes to work and see the fruits of that work. I don't know if that my sense but I believe in numbers. I have finally learned the balanced of being too hard on yourself and proving to yourself what is possible to accomplish with hard work... *soap box* 

Anyways... this week has been wonderful! Why, you ask? Because it was stressful ha ha. Sorella Hallum and I always said, "suffering brings miracles." Yes, it's dramatic but it's also true :) I think what it really reflects on is those times in which we truly feel the refiners fire. When we think it's too hot and we can't handle it. But the fact of the matter is our Heavenly Father knows us better. I remember at the beginning of the mission having so much respect for any person who had ever served a mission. I could not understand how hard it is because I had never experienced it before. Now, I am "comfortable" (not really ever) and confident in my calling because I have been living it fully, accepting my weaknesses, asking for helping, relying on the teachings of my chosen leaders, and most importantly: when there is a problem, I fall to my knees. I have learned that saying, "I can't do this," is not a sign of failure but humility. This week I was able to realize that this is-- or should be-- the path we take with every calling. We are giving these opportunities to grow. At first, it's hard and stressful and we feel a little overwhelmed. Then you start learning, you appreciate the experiences that are helping you grow. And then you are confident, you love your calling and you do it well. Unfortunately this is the shortest phase. I believe phase 2 is the longest. Once you are stable again, that's when you get a new calling, a new chance to learn. There is no complacency in the growth of the kingdom. 

We had a really hard day for me personally this week. I have gotten really good at always being strong and then I just need a minute to kinda breakdown hahaha. *this is not healthy and not advised* But anywho I was having a little dramatic moment and decided to pray. Then we went out. We went to find a referral but they weren't home so we rang the rest of the apt building (going door to door is really just intercom to intercom, there are never doors). Right after that we got a call from someone and all our worries kinda evaporated. It was a really good lesson for me. I know that Heavenly Father always hears me but sometimes I need to have the faith and work until the answer comes. We can't sit and wait until the answer just finds us. We do our part and Heavenly Father always does His. Sometimes a little stress, a little panicking, a little weakness is necessary so that we can become who He wants not who we want.

Last night we had a lesson with the first counselor in the stake presidency. It was really cool because I met him about 3 months ago in our little old hotel in Montevarchi. He invited 2 friends from his work to meet the missionaries and he asked us to teach them. It was a wonderful/ crazy experience! He has his own "gospel art library." Basically a 3 ring binder with tons and tons of gospel images and such. I was teaching about prophets and he pulled it out with an image and threw it on the table. Ha ha. I was so surprised, I had no idea what was happening. It turned out to be a really great experience! He is a wonderful missionary and great teacher! We are told that the best teaching environment is when the member teaches and the missionaries are just there to bear testimony. It really is a much more effective method :) I am going to be such an over-bearing member present lesson ha ha. Sorry missionaries back home! 

There were just so many things I didn't get to talk about! We also had an exchange and Egi is getting baptized on Friday!! So exciting!! I love being a missionary!!

OH! I got a package this week from the members in our ward (in VA). I just cried. It meant so much to me! Thank you so much to all who sent your love and well- wishes! You made one missionary's day extra special! You are the best! 

Lots of love, 

Sorella Jarvis

This week for PDAY we went to San Marino. AKA I left the county haha AKA it's  a city-sized country...


 

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